Since time immemorial, men (and women) have striven to attain lofty heights (and lengths) of hirsutism. For the past 27 months, Justin Collard was just such a man.
Now, it's been said of the Biblical Samson that a man's strength is sapped at the cutting of his hair, but in fact, 'twould be folly to believe such lore.
The truth is, while many a hipster has clutched his fedora in mourning...
...and perhaps even angels have shed a tear or two...
...the hewing of Justin's moustache should not be seen as a death...
...but as a rebirth...
Truly, for it is only through the fall of such a great and powerful mass of curls that a newborn force may rise:
A werebaby has taken its place in this world, "plucked," as it were, from the spectral realm, to take its (f)rightful place amongst society's margins...
So friends, do not feel betrayed by the exposure of Mr. Collard's upper lip, nay.
Feel humbled, and rejoice.
For the 'stache is reborn.
And will live again...
